I Love Puns and these are Punny

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Bergy
Posts: 22468
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2011 9:53 am

I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Bergy » Sat Aug 24, 2013 4:27 pm

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'

14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said 'No change yet.'

17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

21. A backward poet writes inverse.

22. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.

23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects !

Shadows1
Posts: 7246
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2012 3:41 pm

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Shadows1 » Sat Aug 24, 2013 4:47 pm

LOL!!! Some of these I have heard but some are new! Just having to much pun reading these!

Dissie
Posts: 9065
Joined: Thu Oct 13, 2011 12:15 pm

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Dissie » Sat Aug 24, 2013 11:40 pm

Thanks Bergy, I laughed out loud at many of them! Very fun!

Deepster
Posts: 1402
Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2012 1:42 pm

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Deepster » Sat Aug 24, 2013 11:54 pm

I love them, Bergy!! Thanks for sharing some laughs :D

Shadows1
Posts: 7246
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2012 3:41 pm

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Shadows1 » Sat Aug 24, 2013 11:56 pm

One question Bergy...What happened to #18???

Bergy
Posts: 22468
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2011 9:53 am

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Bergy » Sun Aug 25, 2013 11:54 am

Mmmm #18 I really don't know what happened it certainly wasn'tcensored by me - I posted the way it came to me. Perhaps my sender is not too good at counting Ho Ho :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Shadows1
Posts: 7246
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2012 3:41 pm

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Shadows1 » Sun Aug 25, 2013 2:35 pm

OH! I thought you were going to tell me some 1 8 it!

Dissie
Posts: 9065
Joined: Thu Oct 13, 2011 12:15 pm

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Dissie » Sun Aug 25, 2013 2:50 pm

=)) Good one Shadows!

Bergy
Posts: 22468
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2011 9:53 am

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Bergy » Sun Aug 25, 2013 3:22 pm

=)) =)) =)) =)) =)) =))You had that one all planned I'll bet =)) =)) =)) =))

Mary
Posts: 673
Joined: Sat Oct 15, 2011 9:53 am

Re: I Love Puns and these are Punny

Post by Mary » Mon Aug 26, 2013 9:18 am

That was a great way to start the week, Bergy. Here's my thanks in a more enjoyable form -- Pun of the Day

http://www.punoftheday.com/cgi-bin/disppuns.pl?ord=F

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