Step 1: Cake:
Step 2: Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Step 3: Grease two 8" round cake pans, then cut circles of parchment paper to fit the bottoms of them.
Step 4: Press the paper firmly into the pan, squeezing out as many bubbles as possible.
Step 5: Coat the top of the paper with cooking spray.
Step 6: (These cakes really want to stick to the pan. Using paper guarantees that they will fall out after you cut around the sides of the pan.)
Step 7: Cream together the butter, sugar, baking powder, and salt.
Step 8: Add the eggs one at a time, beating well after each.
Step 9: Then alternately add the graham crumbs and the milk;
Step 10: Add about one third of the crumbs, about half of the milk, another third of the crumbs, the rest of the milk, and the last of the crumbs.
Step 11: Batter will look funky.
Step 12: Stir in the coconut.
Step 13: Pour into the pans.
Step 14: Bake 15-20 minutes, or until the center springs back when lightly pressed with your fingertip.
Step 15: Wait until the cake is cool before making the filling and icing.
Step 16: Filling:
Step 17: In a small saucepan, whisk together the sugar and sour cream, eliminating all lumps.
Step 18: Add the remaining ingredients.
Step 19: Place over medium-high heat.
Step 20: Cook, stirring constantly, until it boils for 3 minutes. Remove from heat, and let stand until cooled and thickened.
Step 21: Spread the filling onto the bottom cake layer.
Step 22: Let stand for a few minutes so the filling firms up, then put the other cake layer on top.
Step 23: You may need to insert skewers into the cake to keep it from sliding around.
Step 24: Icing:
Step 25: Beat the butter, egg white, salt , and about 3/4 cup powdered sugar until uniform.
Step 26: Gradually add enough powdered sugar to make the icing thick enough to hold a shape, but soft enough to spread thinly.
Step 27: Coat the top and sides of the cake with a thin layer of icing.
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