Step 1: In a heavy-bottomed saucepan
Step 2: Melt 3 tablespoons of butter over medium heat.
Step 3: Sprinkle in flour, stirring constantly, as the sauce bubbles and cooks for about 2 minutes.
Step 4: Do not let it brown.
Step 5: Stir in hot milk, continuing to stir as sauce thickens.
Step 6: Bring to boil.
Step 7: Add mustard, cayenne, and salt and pepper to taste.
Step 8: Lower heat and cook, stirring constantly, 3 more minutes.
Step 9: Remove from heat.
Step 10: Meanwhile in stockpot
Step 11: Cut cabbage into 8 wedges.
Step 12: Cook in boiling water 8 minutes, until tender.
Step 13: Drain and trim away any tough outside parts that remain.
Step 14: Chop the cabbage coarsely and mix with the sauce.
Step 15: Place it in a buttered 2-quart casserole. Top with bread crumbs and dot the top with tiny pinches of the remaining butter.
Step 16: Heat oven to 400 degrees.
Step 17: Bake casserole 30 minutes.
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